The Balance Theory

I’ve had and heard a lot of kooky theories about canker sores in the years that I’ve had these little demons, and one of the strangest – yet which keeps proving itself true – is what I call the Theory of Balance.

For me, anyway, I only ever seem to have one big painful ulcer at a time in my mouth.  Even if I have a breakout of a few or even several, one will always be the big baddie.  The most painful one.  The biggest one.  All the others will stay small, hurt very little, and usually go away quickly, but that one big bad MFer stays and sucks the life out of me for a week.

Fat guy boxing a skinny guy

There’s only room for one of you.

If I have one ulcer that is causing problems, and another one pops up, the new one will either fade away quickly or the old one will suddenly shrink and disappear.  Only one monster at a time.

Why?  I don’t know.  It doesn’t make sense to me, either.  But I’ve seen it over and over again.

My last breakout saw three ulcers pop up.  One below my bottom lip, one under my tongue, and one on my left cheek.  The one on my tongue took over, and the one on my cheek quickly went away, and the one below my lip stayed but never really hurt much.  Then, just a few days ago, I somehow got a small cut on my lip that of course turned into a 3mm+ long monstrosity that hurts like a nipple caught in a mousetrap.

Guess what happened to that bad one on my tongue?  Gone.  Immediately.

There can be only one.

I never knew my canker sores were acting out the story of Highlander.

Maybe it has to do with the immune response, that the acute phase proteins that cause inflammation can only handle one spot at a time, and when they find a new target, the old one stops swelling and heals itself.  What if I could fool the reaction to go somewhere else that doesn’t ulcerate and let my mouth be normal?

I know just enough to be dangerous.

Anybody else experienced this?  Let me hear it in the comments!

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